The Throne That Won’t Flush: Let’s Talk Toilet Clogs
By Stephen Jordan, CEO & Founder of SMJ Plumbing, Slidell, LA
Hey Slidell — Stephen Jordan here, founder, chief pipe whisperer, and occasional drain therapist at SMJ Plumbing.
Today, let’s talk about something we’ve all dealt with but no one wants to admit: the dreaded toilet clog. Yep — the ol’ porcelain throne rebellion. It happens to the best of us, so don’t feel bad. I promise, your secret’s safe with me… and my team… and sometimes your neighbors if you try to fix it yourself at 2 a.m. and end up knee-deep in “yuck.”
Why Do Toilets Get Clogged Anyway?
You’d think that toilets, of all things, would be built to handle their one job. But alas, not all thrones are created equal — and sometimes, well, people get a little too ambitious.
-Here’s the Hall of Fame of Toilet Clog Culprits:
– Too much TP (looking at you, overzealous kids and house guests)
– “Flushable” wipes — spoiler alert: they’re not flushable.
– Toys. Yep, kids love baptizing action figures.
– Feminine products — just don’t.
– Old, low-flow toilets that can’t keep up.
– And sometimes… well, sometimes life just happens.
DIY or Call in the Cavalry?
If it’s a simple clog, by all means, give that plunger a workout. Just remember: plunging is an art form, not a sport. Don’t be out there slamming it like you’re arm wrestling a gator — gentle, consistent pressure is key.
If you’re on your third plunger attempt, the water’s dangerously close to the rim, and you’re Googling “how to snake a toilet” with panic in your eyes — that’s your sign to call me.
Trying to force it usually makes things worse. Trust me — I’ve seen it all: broken porcelain, flooded bathrooms, and good towels sacrificed in desperation. Save the towels. Call SMJ.
What Happens When We Show Up?
First off, we’re not here to judge. I promise — you will not shock me. We’ll assess the situation, clear the blockage safely (we’ve got augers and tools your plunger can only dream of), and check that nothing bigger is lurking in your pipes.
Sometimes a simple clog is just that — but sometimes it’s a symptom of a bigger drain line issue. Roots, broken pipes, or years of buildup — that’s where we shine.
How to Keep the Throne Flowing
Stephen’s Royal Rules of Toilet Etiquette:
– Flush only TP and what the good Lord gave you.
– Go easy on the TP mountain — flush halfway if needed.
– Keep a trash can nearby for wipes and other “flushables.”
– If you’ve got repeat clogs, get your drain line checked — there may be a bigger problem.
When in Doubt, Call Your Plumber
Look, life’s too short to stand there with a plunger and a prayer. If your toilet’s staging a coup, call SMJ Plumbing. We’ll fix it fast, keep things discreet, and leave your bathroom sparkling like it never betrayed you.
When the throne rebels, Stephen Jordan’s here to restore order — no crown required.
SMJ Plumbing | Slidell, LA
Got a clog? Call the King of Clear Pipes — we’ll keep the royal flush rolling.